Despite the Doubleness; Resting Transparently

Well folks, after many broken promises, it is finally happening. I've started a Praxisoscope entry on The Dark Knight. It probably won't be finished until tomorrow night, since it's gone and gotten late on me here in California. I promise though, this will be a triumphant return, leaning strongly on my continual theme that any ethical schema assumes a sociology. The Joker inspired me, so you should go see the movie this weekend and let me know what you think.

The details and logistics of moving to Boston are eating me alive. The black afternoons I'd written of before aren't so awful anymore, but I'm still not myself. Sleep habits aren't settled and I've been eating mostly junk for a week. My bike got backed into in the garage, so that's out of commission as a form of exercise and locomotive freedom. Getting back to work at school will help, no doubt, with all of this melancholy. My poor family though. It must be like living with a zombie.

I am napping quite successfully though.

I'm heading out to Boston next week to try to locate a place to live and to glad hand financial aid types. Be praying that I don't exhaust myself or find some insurmountable complication. I need things to go smoothly from here on through. I fly a red eye out on Monday night and come back Friday afternoon.

How I'd like my life to look in Boston? Something like this:

-Get up around 6 am and Showered/dressed/shaved/etc by 7.
-Get a cup of coffee and write for an hour
-Get to work for 4 or 5 hours, preferably TA-ing or some other academic drudgery related to teaching.
-Take lunch and go for a bike ride or go for a bike ride and then take lunch or bike to-and-from lunch somewhere, preferably w/ a friend.
-Work on a project or hobby. Something for my sanity. Maybe have an afternoon guitar lesson? Maybe research TV series ideas? Pick up roller/ice hockey, depending on the season? Maybe just have a shower and a nap.
-Go to class and learn about philosophers and what-not.
-Get home, make myself dinner and study/study/study/study until I have to sleep.

I don't know how reasonable/realistic that is, but it sure sounds nice right now. Sounds like the good life to me. Routine, but routine w/ a diversity of interests, focuses and goals. That's how I keep the committee meeting in my head from pulling my life apart. I've gotta keep those fantasies rolling through my head, cuz the logistics of loans and housing and working and debt and....well, you can see how quickly I snowball.

Having a realm or a field in which I feel like a whole person is great. I don't tend to be good at .... well, most things. So to have an area where I'm getting the opportunity to pursue my giftedness is a blessing. On the other hand, it makes me less worried about trying to shore up my deficiencies in other areas. Cuz when I get all jammed up trying to look more whole than I am most of the time, I don't do my work very well.

or at all.